- Rob Lowe and Sheryl Berkoff have been married for 33 years.
- Lowe said the pair has turned to couple therapy, even when they "didn't need it."
- A family and marriage therapist said couples need to be willing to commit to therapy for it to work.
Rob Lowe has been married to Sheryl Berkoff for 33 years, and the actor's open about how they've kept the marriage strong.
"Sheryl and I are big believers in therapy and, you know, marriage counseling," he told Ted Danson on Team Coco's "Where Everybody Knows Your Name" podcast on Wednesday.
He said they've gone for counseling, even when they "didn't need it." "It's like taking your car in and making sure the engine's running great," he said.
The "Unstable" star added that going to couples therapy is often associated with the idea that a marriage is in trouble. "That's not what it should be. It should be like going to the trainers. It should literally be like, 'I went to the chiropractor,'" he said.
Lowe and Berkoff met on a blind date in 1983 but only started dating after reconnecting in 1989 on the set of "Bad Influence," where Berkoff was a makeup artist. They married in 1991 and have two sons, Matthew and John Owen.
During the podcast, Lowe added that the secret to their long-lasting marriage was being "willing to catch up" with each other, even when they grew at different speeds.
"Sometimes, it's been my job to catch up with her. Other times, it's been her job to catch up with me," he said.
He said they're also "good friends" and work on problems in the relationship instead of thinking "the grass is greener" with someone else.
"Whatever problem you think you have — and maybe you do have them — you go, 'I'm likely to have the same problem with the next person, so I might as well fix it here with this one, right,'" he said.
The benefits of couples therapy
Last year, Verywell Mind surveyed 1,106 US adults who lived with their partner, and 99% of respondents who'd been to couples therapy said it positively impacted their relationship.
Business Insider reported in 2019 that couples who argue frequently, avoid conflict, disagree on money matters, cheat, lack intimacy, or have considered divorce could benefit from professional help.
"But it's not about just showing up. Each person has to be willing to commit to the process for long enough for lasting change to occur," Mary Kay Cocharo, a licensed family and marriage therapist, told BI at the time.
Couples thinking about therapy should also consider different types and find the right therapist.
"Since you are going to share some of your most intimate thoughts and emotions, I believe the therapist you choose to work with is more important than the methodology that they use," Gary Brown, a licensed family and marriage therapist, told BI in 2021.
A representative for Lowe didn't immediately respond to a request for comment from BI sent outside regular business hours.